The (positive) outcome of being authentic

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Text en Español al final del posteo ♥

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I think it’s safe to say I’m transmuting into a new stage in my life. As if I had flipped the page over and started a new chapter. Or a “Part 2” of any good, long book that still’s got so much to cover.

I didn’t actually realize I had changed so much until someone told me so. But that’s usually the case right? We live constantly in our heads, so we never really see the small, daily changes that stack up until we have already become completely different people.

Quite scary if you ask me. What if the change wasn’t so good? Would we be willing to listen to someone tell us we’re going off the good path for us? How do we tell apart the people who know what’s good for us and what isn’t?

Still, the topic that I want to cover today is the (positive) outcome of being authentic, of being yourself unapologetically.


 

The first thing that comes to mind when you think of being entirely yourself, is “there’s no way no one’s going to love me this way”.

We were taught that our unedited selves aren’t worthy of being show proudly and publicly. We see examples of this everywhere: the perfect, candid shots on Instagram, the way we walk into relationships pretending we are always polished and neat and that we definitely do not skip a shower every other work out (guilty of that one *hand up*).

Yet something incredibly beautiful happens when you let yourself be vulnerable to other people.

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Your light shines through

People directly see who you are since day 1. No masks, no walls, no barriers. Just your raw, transparent self.

My babes at work see me exactly for who I am: the nerdy, Japanese culture loving girl who adores cutesy stuff and curses every 5 minutes. The girl who loves fashion, make-up and a good conversation. The girl who likes both k-pop and some death metal. I’m loud and when I laugh, I laugh for real; I don’t just giggle, I just openly snort like a pig!

You might or might not like me, but it can’t be said I’m not authentic.

And, believe it or not, people are actually drawn to that. When they see you’re all light, no drama, not toxic. We crave these kinds of people. Despite all the shit we go through each day that shapes and conditions us, we still crave the lightness, the healthiness. We want to surround ourselves with these kind of individuals because it’s freaking contagious.
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fashion, fashionista, moda, blogger argentina, fashion blogger, fashion blogger argentina, blogger, lifestyle blogger, thoughts, ootd, outfit, style, look, outfit of the day, lookbook, what i wore, style, spring style, ss style, summer style, ugly dad sneakers, mom jeans, snow white, authenticity
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I’m wearing

White gathered blouse
Bik Bok 🇸🇪

Light blue mom jeans
Zara 🇦🇷

Ugly dad sneakers
Americanino (Falabella) 🇦🇷

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It takes a lot of guts to meet somebody and say:

“Hi there, here you have all the tools needed to hurt me. I will trust you won’t use them”.

It takes strength and a sense of confidence that I know is not easy to obtain, but that is so necessary to have better quality relationships with people.

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I used to be so uptight around people

Always putting up my walls. So defensive. As if I was ready for people to pounce me (spoiler alert: it never happened; probably never will). As if pretending to be someone else was going to spare me the pain of getting rejected, when in reality being myself lately has saved me more trouble and pain than any mask I could come up with.

Everything feels breezy now.

Chatting with people feels lighter. Conversations turn more genuine each time. I can relate and be more empathetic compared to when I was shielding myself. My connection with others is healthier and everything adds up to my life, it doesn’t subtract like before.

It’s making me immensely happier!

What are your thoughts in authenticity? Is it hard for you to be authentic?

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El resultado (positivo) de ser auténticx

Creo que puedo decir con seguridad que estoy en una nueva etapa de mi vida. Como si hubiera dado vuelta a la página para arrancar un nuevo capítulo. O la “Parte 2” de cualquier buen y largo libro que aún tiene mucho por contar.

No me di cuenta de los cambios que estaba transitando hasta que me lo dijeron personas de mi confianza en el trabajo. Pero ese es usualmente el caso, ¿o no? Vivimos constantemente metidos en nuestras cabezas, por lo que nunca vemos cómo los cambios de rutina más insignificantes y pequeños toman una gran escala cuando comienzan a conglomerarse y nos transforman en personas completamente diferentes.

Da miedo, para ser honesta. ¿Qué pasa si el cambio que estás haciendo no es tan bueno? ¿Seríamos capaces de escuchar cuando el otro nos dice que nos estamos desviando del camino? ¿Y cómo nos damos cuenta qué personas saben a ciencia cierta qué es bueno para nosotros y no lo es?


De todos modos, el tema que hoy quiero cubrir es acerca de el resultado (positivo) de ser auténticx, de ser vos mismx sin pedir perdón ni disculparse.

Lo primero que se nos viene a la cabeza cuando pensamos en ser nosotros mismxs es, “no hay manera de que alguien me quiera si me muestro tal como soy”.

Nos enseñan desde chicos que nuestros yo sin edición, sin la pompa, no son dignos de ser mostrados con orgullo y públicamente. Vemos ejemplos de esto que les digo por todos lados: las fotos perfectas y superplaneadas de Instagram, la forma en que nos metemos en relaciones con otros pretendiendo ser siempre prolijitos y correctos, como si nunca se nos hubiera escapado bañarnos un día de entrenamiento (soy culpable de haberlo hecho *levanta la mano*).

Y aún así y todo algo increíblemente hermoso pasa cuando dejás caer tus defensas y te permitís ser vulnerable frente a otras personas.

Comenzás a brillar, FUERTE

La gente ve directamente quién sos realmente desde el día 1. Nada de máscaras, paredes, barreras. Solo vos, en crudo, transparente.

Mis bbs en el trabajo me ven exactamente como soy: la piba nerd, fanática de la cultura Japonesa que ama las cosas cute de la vida y putea cada 5 minutos. La piba que ama la ropa, el maquillaje y una buena conversación. La piba que le encanta el k-pop y el death metal. Soy gritona y cuando me río, me río POSTA; no, no así por lo bajo, sino risa de cerdito ok?!

Puede que te caiga bien o no, que te guste o no, pero no podés decir que no soy auténtica.

Y, aunque ud no lo crea, ¡a la gente eso le encanta y le atrae! Cuando ven que sos todo luz, cero tóxicx, cero drama. Todos queremos rodearnos de personas con esas cualidades. Más allá de toda la mierda que pasamos todos los días que nos condiciona y da forma como personas, aún queremos en nuestro círculo personas relajadas, sanas, con buena vibra. Queremos tenerlxs cerca porque esa actitud es jodidamente contagiosa.


Hay que tener mucho coraje para ir a decirle a alguien básicamente:

“Hola, qué tal, acá tener todas las herramientas que necesitás para poder herirme. Confío en que no las vas a usar.”.

Hay que ser fuerte y tener un sentido muy cementado de confianza que yo se que es re difícil de obtener, pero que es hiper necesario para tener mejores y más saludables relaciones con la gente.

Solía estar tan indignada y tensa con la gente

Siempre poniéndome mi máscara. Siempre a la defensiva. Como si estuviera esperando que la gente me saltara encima a atacarme (spoiler alert: nunca pasó; probablemente nunca pase). Como si pretender ser otra persona me fuera a ahorrar el dolor de ser rechazada, cuando ser yo misma en realidad me ahorró el trabajo y el tiempo de ver si a alguien le copaba mi yo verdadero o no.

Ahora todo se siente más light, como una brisa.

Charlar con la gente ya no me pesa. Las conversaciones son más genuinas cada día que pasa que me suelto. Puedo entender mejor cómo funciona la gente y por ende mis capacidades empáticas mejoran. Mis conexiones con los demás se tornan más sanas y todo suma, nada me está restando como sí me pasaba antes.

Y lo que más importante, ¡es que me hace muy felíz!

¿Qué piensan acerca de ser auténticx? ¿Les cuesta?

Follow:
Sora

6 Comments

  1. September 30, 2018 / 3:37 pm

    Amazing outfit! It’s hard to say, I believe that I’m authentic but sometimes my work make me less me and then I feel like I’m not authentic at all since I’ve been limited by something or someone. It’s hard to be transparent because we all wear masks to hide some stuff from the world and have something only for ourselves.

    • Sora
      Author
      October 1, 2018 / 10:10 am

      Oh no, I don’t think keeping stuff to yourself equals to wearing a mask! I certainly do keep some things to myself, mostly to have at least a bit of privacy which is something I’m terrible at considering I share so much of myself online 😛 I just think that whatever thing you are actually showing to people should be genuine, and not some modified version of yourself ♥

    • Sora
      Author
      October 1, 2018 / 10:10 am

      Thank you Laura! :*

    • Sora
      Author
      October 6, 2018 / 4:34 pm

      Oh, I am very introverted as well! Well, at least that part of introversion where you feel like being around peopel all the time drains you, so you need some alone time to recharge those batteries 😛

      Thanks so much for stopping by! 🙂

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